You Don't Deserve Me
by kittie88
Summary: "You had to do it, Jesse. She was just a distraction. She would've just held you back."  Jesse's POV during the "Funk" episode


(Jesse's POV)

I looked back at Rachel and saw the pain and betrayal in her eyes. I followed the rest of Vocal Adrenaline off the stage and they were all hyped up. They were talking about messing with the New Directions some more and something about their choir room. I could seriously care less. That had to be one of the hardest things I've ever done. The look on Rachel's face after we performed "Another One Bites the Dust" was heart wrenching.

"Come on, Jesse, are you coming with us?"

I was broken from my trance and just scoffed.

"Whatever, I'm over this. See you at school."

"Come on, Jesse; don't tell me you feel bad for Berry."

"Look, I'm not sorry for anyone. I just don't feel the need to be here anymore."

I stormed out of the building and prayed to God that they believed it. I rushed to my car and raced towards the record store. I needed to take my mind off of Rachel and that look she gave me. Maybe I could ask Shelby if I could tell Rachel the real reason I transferred to McKinley. But will that really make things better? Rachel would probably just think that it was all a lie but it wasn't. I really did start to have feelings for her. I sat outside the record store before deciding just to go back to Carmel. I pulled into the school parking lot and none of my teammates from Vocal Adrenaline were there yet. I walked into the auditorium and saw Shelby going through her notes. She looked up at me.

"Where have you been and where are the others?"

"We went to McKinley to intimidate Rachel and the others. Also, I needed to tell Rachel that I transferred back."

"Was she upset?"

I scoffed.

"What do you think?"

"I didn't ask you to make her fall in love with you, Jesse. I just wanted you to befriend her. I asked you if you were alright to do that for me and you assured me that you could do this."

I deeply sighed and slumped into one of the chairs.

"I know. I just wasn't expecting to feel like this."

"Jesse, did you fall in love, too?"

Suddenly, the side doors opened and the rest of the team filed in. I could tell that they were pissed that I took off and that I would pay for it later. We began rehearsals and Giselle was just studying my every move. We had a five minute break two hours later and she pulled me aside.

"What's going on with you, Jesse?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You're distracted! You're a half a beat behind and you have this blank stare on your face. You're still upset about this morning, aren't you?"

"You don't know what your-"

"Stop with the lying, Jesse! Dammit, you're pissing the hell out of me! She's the enemy. Rachel Berry is just a Barbara Streisand wannabe and you are too good for her. So you need to forget about her because we need you to be the badass that you are so that we can take Regionals and then Nationals."

She walked back to the stage and left me by myself. She was right.

_I am Jesse St. James and I am the star of Vocal Adrenaline._

It was almost midnight when Giselle came running into the auditorium. She had gone out to her car to go get some props for one of the numbers.

"They slashed our tires!"

Everyone ran out to the parking lot and she was right. Every one of our Range Rovers was lowered to the floor. I felt the anger flowing through me and I turned to Giselle.

"We're gonna make those McKinley losers pay."

She gave me a devilish smile and Ms. Corcoran ushered us all back into the building. She assured us that she would go talk to Mr. Shuester and the Principal of McKinley in the morning but I had something else in mind and it involved little miss Rachel Berry.

* * *

><p>I drove into the McKinley parking lot and my stomach was in knots. I really didn't want to do this but I had to, for the team. And maybe for myself, too. I really did care for her and I could tell that I would always be second to Finn Hudson. I got out of my car and took a deep breath. I watched as the team grabbed eggs from the carton. They handed me the last egg and then discarded the carton.<p>

"Okay, Jesse, we're ready. Call her."

I faked a smile and dialed Rachel's number.

_Please don't answer, please don't answer._

She answered.

"Meet me out in the parking lot."

I hung up before she could say anything. Everyone hid as Rachel came running out. I tried my hardest to smile and waved at her. Damn, she looked so hopeful. This is going to kill her. Why couldn't she have looked annoyed or mad and make this easier on me. My smile disappeared as my 'friends' came out and started pelting her. I saw the look of shock on her face when the eggs started hitting her. She tried to duck and closed her eyes.

_What am I doing? How could I ever think that this was a good idea? I can't do this._

"Do it, Jesse! Are you with us or not?"

I hadn't realized that everyone was just staring at me, waiting for me to hit her. I walked up to her and pushed my feelings aside. I needed to do this; I needed to show Vocal Adrenaline that I was a team player. She looked me in the eyes and I could see the pain in them. She tells me that I broke her heart and I find that hard to believe since everyone knows that I was just the rebound guy after that dumb jock didn't want her. I looked back in her eyes and finally admitted the truth.

"I loved you."

I slowly broke the egg over her head, which I admit is kinda dramatic but I wanted to get my point across. It wasn't until I saw the tears run down her face that I realized that I hurt a girl that I truly cared about. I couldn't stand to see her this way. I needed to leave. I quickly got into my car and drove away. I had no idea where I was driving to but I just knew that I needed to get away from it all. The image of Rachel covered in egg was still burned in my mind.

_You had to do it, Jesse. She was just a distraction. She would've just held you back._

* * *

><p>I walked down the hall to practice when my phone started ringing. It was Rachel. I contemplated answering the phone but, knowing Rachel, she would just keep calling until I'd finally answer.<p>

"Hello?"

"Jesse St. James, Will Shuester here."

_Huh?_

"You and Vocal Adrenaline need to meet in our auditorium. Friday, three sharp."

He hung up the phone and I was still confused. I walked into rehearsal and was relieved that Ms. Corcoran wasn't there yet. She didn't know that we egged Rachel and I kinda wanted to keep it that way.

"Hey guys, the director of New Directions just called me and told us to meet them at their auditorium on Friday."

"They're probably going to lecture us on sportsmanship and crap like that. Rachel will probably be acting the victim. Oh, I love it!"

It was finally Friday and we all filed into the seats in the auditorium. The band was all set up and I realized that they were going to perform a number.

_This ought to be good._

Rachel walked out and addressed us all. They then started performing "Give up the Funk". They were really good. But like really good. I looked towards Giselle and she looked truly worried, which made me even more uneasy.

_They actually pulled off a Funk number with ease._

They exited the stage and we all just sat there.

"They did a Funk number. We have never been able to pull off a Funk number."

"That's because we're soulless automatons."

"I'm so depressed."

And I was. We left the school and I saw Rachel walking with Finn. A part of me wanted to say I was sorry but the other part was still angry because here I was missing Rachel and she had obviously moved on.

_I need to win Regionals, I need to show her who the real star is._


End file.
